“What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bees and he told me about the butcher and my wife.” - Rodney Dangerfield “I came from a real tough neighborhood. Why, every time I shut the window I hurt somebody's fingers.” - Rodney Dangerfield
“A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: 'Duh'.” - Conan OBrien
