Humor Quotes

John UpdikeA healthy male adult bore consumes each year one and a half times his own weight in other people's patience. - John Updike
Topics: Humor   John Updike Quotes
Destiny Cards Quotes: Five of Diamonds Quotes   Life Path Quotes: Lifepath 9  Lifepath 36
Woody AllenIf only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss Bank. - Woody Allen
Topics: Humor, Good Advice   Woody Allen Quotes
Destiny Cards Quotes: Four of Diamonds Quotes   Life Path Quotes: Lifepath 4  Lifepath 31
Mark TwainGiving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times. - Mark Twain
Topics: Humor   Mark Twain Quotes
Destiny Cards Quotes: Three of Hearts Quotes   Life Path Quotes: Lifepath 4  Lifepath 58
Lawrence FerlinghettiIf you're too open-minded; your brains will fall out. - Lawrence Ferlinghetti
Topics: Humor   Lawrence Ferlinghetti Quotes
Destiny Cards Quotes: Queen of Clubs Quotes   Life Path Quotes: Lifepath 11  Lifepath 47
Oscar WildeTo get back my youth I would do anything in the world, except take exercise, get up early, or be respectable. - Oscar Wilde
Topics: Humor   Oscar Wilde Quotes
Destiny Cards Quotes: Six of Clubs Quotes   Life Path Quotes: Lifepath 8  Lifepath 44
John HodgmanGenerally speaking, I think it is fair to say that I am a friend to the creatures of the Earth when I am not busy eating them or wearing them. - John Hodgman
Topics: Humor, Experiences   John Hodgman Quotes
Destiny Cards Quotes: Ace of Spades Quotes   Life Path Quotes: Lifepath 9  Lifepath 27
Charles BukowskiSome people never go crazy. What truly horrible lives they must lead. - Charles Bukowski
Topics: Humor, Being Crazy   Charles Bukowski Quotes
Destiny Cards Quotes: Ten of Clubs Quotes   Life Path Quotes: Lifepath 9  Lifepath 36
Margaret AtwoodLonged for him. Got him. Shit. - Margaret Atwood
Topics: Love, Humor   Margaret Atwood Quotes
Destiny Cards Quotes: Two of Clubs Quotes   Life Path Quotes: Lifepath 6  Lifepath 51
Rita RudnerI love being married. It's so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. - Rita Rudner
Topics: Love, Humor   Rita Rudner Quotes
Destiny Cards Quotes: Seven of Clubs Quotes   Life Path Quotes: Lifepath 8  Lifepath 44
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Carl Jung
The pendulum of the mind alternates between sense and nonsense, not between right and wrong. - Carl Jung