“Don't ever give anybody your best advice, because they're not going to follow it.” - Jack Nicholson “We are going as fast as we can as soon as we can. We're in a race against time, until we run out of money.” - Jack Nicholson
“You only lie to two people in your life, your girlfriend and the police.” - Jack Nicholson “The minute that you're not learning I believe you're dead.” - Jack Nicholson
“A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: 'Duh'.” - Conan OBrien
